All of the Narcissistic Abuse victims have their own reasons as to why they stayed so long in a relationship despite the abuse and, in this article, I will share my biggest reason.
My relationship with my ex lasted for about 5 years.
It lasted that long primarily due to my lack of knowledge about Narcissistic Personality Disorder, therefore, I had no clue as to what I was dealing with at that time.
However, despite the duration, within those 5 years, I couldn’t even count how many times I did want to end the relationship with him because I kept on having this feeling that there’s really something off about him.
But, for some unexplainable reasons, I would always resort into giving him the benefit of the doubt simply because he would always show me his good sides after treating me so badly or doing something which upsets me.
That made things so confusing for me.
No matter how much I wanted to put an end to our toxic relationship, I would always end up thinking that maybe it was just him being “not perfect” — because who is?
And also because I acknowledged the fact that I had my own share of shortcomings as well.
Funny that he was able to convince me that I was the bad person in the relationship because I was the one who would always get upset first.
I was too blind to realize that he was intentionally pressing my buttons by committing the same mistakes over and over again.
And now that I’m aware of how Narcissistic people manipulate their victims by doing gaslighting, I can already say that it was all part of his manipulative nature as someone who has this kind of personality disorder.
I only found out that he’s a Narcissist when, one day, I read some articles which talked about Narcissistic Personality Disorder after typing on Google search the keywords “my partner is a serial cheater”.
I did that after my shocking discovery that my ex had been having several affairs with multiple women.
My discoveries turned my world upside down but, at least, made things clear to me.
Form then on, everything started making sense.
That’s when I also learned that the situation I’ve been dealing with was not temporary so I encouraged myself to finally make a decision in order to put an end to that never-ending cycle of abuses.
And months after learning about Narcissistic Personality Disorder, I was able to successfully escape my toxic relationship with my ex and I never had any desire to look back since then.
At this point, I can really say that knowledge about Narcissism and Narcissistic Abuse is very crucial and pivotal to anyone who is experiencing this type of situation.
Had I known about it then, my 5-year relationship wouldn’t have lasted that long.
Actually, we would not have been in a relationship to begin with because for sure I would not have given my ex even an ounce of my attention.