The Real “Best Moms”

The Real Best Moms

The term “Best Mom” was something new to me years ago when I just became a mother to my first (and only) born child.

I was already 36 years old when I became a mother but, despite the age, a lot of things were still new to me given that I did not have any prior experience in taking care of someone younger than I am.

And because of that, I was glued to doing research online and reading a lot of reference materials to help me get through what we call First Time Motherhood.

So while I was doing a lot of research, I discovered this new mom title that’s been making rounds over Social Media during those times: Best Mom

What “Best Mom” Really Means?

Before you feel flattered upon being called as a Best Mom, please be aware that this title actually doesn’t mean anything about being “best” at all.

Contrary to what the title obviously states, it’s the complete opposite.

It is rather a more sarcastic take on how it sounds.

Apparently, Best Mom title is what we can call all the know-it-all moms who seem to have all the time in the world to criticize every inch of every mom’s (or dad’s) parenting style.

Best Moms usually target first time mothers who are highly likely clueless or amateur when it comes raising a child.

It’s the go-to term nowadays to blow a counter-mockery that would surely leave a dent on that person’s perfect self, without the use of any profanity or hurtful words.

In Tagalog, they are the ones we call as “Mamaru” — short for Mamarunong! (Translation: Know-It-All)

Real Life Example

I started out as an exclusively breastfeeding mother (that was my dream, by the way) until I experienced a lot of challenges because my baby was not good at latching to me directly.

Perhaps my nipples were not protruding enough for my baby to make use of them during breastfeeding.

I tried using nipple shields to help but it not aid that much.

That problem would often result into a fussy and more hungry baby which makes feeding time more horrifying than fulfilling.

Because of that, I switched to becoming an exclusively breast-pumping mother to still offer breastmilk to my baby even though she’s not doing the direct latch.

Luckily, she learned how to bottle-feed quite well and early and things started to get really better from then on.

However, some Best Moms would not okay that move.

They would still find reasons to criticize your methods regardless of how beneficial it had been for you and your little one.

One Best Mom told me,

“Oh! You should have not stopped from doing direct latching no matter how challenging it was. You should have continuously tried until your baby got used to it. You’re maybe doing something wrong, that’s why. Nothing beats direct feeding because it gives you and your baby a strong bond. It’s a wonderful experience.”

To which I responded,

“Hi, Best Mom! It’s okay. Don’t worry, in case my daughter grows up not having a close relationship with me, I won’t blame you. Important thing for me now is to make sure that she would grow up and not die because of hunger.”

I just don’t understand why Best Moms love to criticize your ways when it would’ve been more helpful if they were supportive and compassionate instead of trying to put someone else down by playing the role of an expert.

And how could they be an expert to someone else’s child if they could not be an expert in raising their own child?

These Best Moms deserved nothing but the “Best Audacity” trophy.

But don’t get me wrong, I always welcome suggestions and pieces of advice but not in a way they would criticize how I do things.

For me, that is an outright disrespect of your capability.

To avoid doing this to our fellow moms, always keep in mind that we all have our own ways of doing things.

Things that have worked for your child do not guarantee that the same would work to another child.

You Are the Real “Best Mom” To Your Own Child

To my fellow moms, especially the new and struggling ones, let’s keep our heads up.

Motherhood is the best job in the world and we all know that this is also not the easiest job 99% of the time.

We are doing the best we can and that’s what really matters.

Never ever let a Best Mom crush our spirit.

Because, at the end of day, there’s only one Real Best Mom for our little one…us!


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